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There are reasons why you are not in love with your partner? You might have stopped and thought about this at one point in your love journey.
In this blog, we are going to talk about why you are not in love with your partner anymore and what you should do about it.
Having a partner that you can’t get enough of is a wonderful feeling. You are always attracted to them, you want to be around them all the time, and you can’t wait to see what the future holds for your relationship.
But what happens when those feelings begin to fade? When you realize that you aren’t in love with your partner anymore?
While this can be devastating, it’s not uncommon. For some of us, we stay in relationships because we’re afraid of leaving.
We stay because we have so much history with our partners that it feels wrong to walk away. We stay because it’s easy and comfortable.
And while those reasons are valid, if you’re staying for those reasons, then there’s a good chance that you won’t be able to fall back in love with your partner.
If you want to fall in love again, then there has to be a deeper reason for wanting to stay together — one that has nothing to do with comfort or fear and everything to do with attraction and desire.
29 Reasons Why You Are Not In Love With Your Partner
Do you remember the feeling of love? It is amazing. The heart beating faster, the joy, the excitement and the desire. But what if this feeling is lost over time? If you do not feel the same about your partner as before.
Here are 29 reasons why you’re not in love with your partner anymore, and what to do about it:
1. You Are Giving Up On Each Other
It’s true that not everyone stays in love for their whole lives, but most people have been able to start loving each other again if they’ve been willing to work at it.
If you don’t give up on each other, chances are good that your relationship will recover.
2. You Are Afraid Of What The Future Holds
Sometimes we lose faith that our relationships will last because we are afraid of the future.
The only way to overcome this fear is to be honest with yourself and your partner about how you feel.
3. You Think You Can Do Better
Sometimes we get into relationships and realize that we can do better than our current partner.
There’s nothing wrong with this as long as you don’t hurt anyone in the process of trying to find someone better suited to your needs.
4. He/She Is Not Who You Thought They Were
You idealized your partner when you first met them. Now, you see that they have flaws, which disappoints you.
To find love again for your partner, it’s important to remember the person they were when you first fell in love with them.
It’s likely that some of those qualities are still there, although they may be buried under layers of pain and disappointment.
5. You Can’t Forgive Him/Her For What He/She Did
You may not be able to forgive your partner for something he or she did in the past that hurt you deeply — infidelity or some other betrayal of trust, for example. But think about how much time has passed between then and now.
6. You Are Not Attracted To Them Anymore
This is a sad, but common reason why you are no longer in love with your partner.
You might be wondering how this could have happened because after all, you were attracted to them in the beginning.
7. You Are Not Compatible
You may have been compatible when you first met each other, but you’ve changed since then and so has your partner.
8. You Don’t Respect Your Partner Any More
Not respecting your partner anymore is one of the many reasons why you are not in love with your partner.
You may have once respected them, seen them as an equal and admired their achievements. But now you find yourself putting them down, disagreeing with everything they say and thinking that they are stupid.
9. There Is No Trust Between You Any More
Trust is an essential part of any relationship, without it there can be no love. Once broken it can be very hard to repair the damage.
SEE: How To Build Trust In A Relationship
However, if you feel like your partner has broken your trust then it could be one of the reasons why you are not In love with your partner anymore.
10. You Are Too Judgemental And Critical Of Your Partner
Do you often find yourself criticising your partner for bad habits, sloppiness and lack of ambition? Do you think that you can change him/her and turn them into someone more like you? If so it’s time to change your approach.
11. You Feel That Your Partner Does Not Care About You As much As You Care About Them
What to do: Relationship expert Alexandra Redcay says it’s important to discuss your feelings with your partner. “The only way to find out why your partner is not showing the same level of interest in you is by talking openly and honestly,” she advises. ”
Try saying something like, ‘I feel like we’re not as close as we used to be and I miss that. What’s been up with you lately?’ Or, ‘I know we don’t spend as much time together anymore and it makes me sad. What can we do to change this?'”
12. Your Relationship Doesn’t Feel Exciting Or New Anymore
What to do: We recommends doing fun, new things together and taking time out of your busy schedules to reconnect.
Also going on dates where you aren’t glued to your phone. “The best thing for a relationship is undivided attention,” she says. “Try going on a date without any technology whatsoever.”
13. You’ve Been Together For A Long Time, So Things Have Gotten Boring And Predictable
What to do: Make an effort to get back in touch with the early days of your relationship by retracing your steps and spice up your relationship to give it a better taste.
14. You Don’t Know What You Want From A Relationship
If this is the case, it could be that you are not in love with your partner because your needs and expectations are not being met.
In order to address this, you will need to think carefully about what you want from a relationship, and what changes to your own behaviour may be required to achieve this.
15. You Have Drifted Apart Over Time
If this is the case, it may be that either of you have changed significantly over the course of your relationship.
It may be that you are no longer compatible with each other as a result of these changes, or that one or both of you have realised that there is something missing from the relationship.
16. They Have No Plans For The Future
Someone who is content with where they are at in life might be okay with having a stagnant relationship.
But if you have goals and ambitions outside of your relationship, chances are you’ll want someone who can share your vision and help you achieve your goals – even if it means moving away from them someday soon.
17. You’re Stuck In A Rut
You’re stuck in a rut and you want out. You want to feel excitement again. You’re tired of the same old routine, but you don’t know how to change it.
You’ve been together so long that the relationship has lost its zest, but you don’t want to hurt anyone. You want to keep your family together for the sake of the children.
18. Your Expectations Are Too High
Your expectations are too high and you’ve put your partner on a pedestal. He or she no longer measures up to your idealised version of them, so you feel let down and disappointed.
Now, you need to accept that he or she is human, just like everyone else. Relatioship/Marriage is about loving each other for who they are and not what they can do for you or give you. Don’t expect too much from them.
19. You Don’t Want To Commit
Relationships are hard work, and when we commit to someone, we are signing up for a long-term contract. Despite this fact, most of us don’t like to commit because it is much easier to give up on a relationship than take the time to fix it.
We don’t want to try new things or deal with our emotions. So instead of working things out or admitting that we have been wrong, we just walk away from the relationship and justify our decision with reasons such as “I wasn’t in love with them anyway!”
20. You Are Afraid Of Getting Hurt
It is scary falling in love with someone because the more you love them, the more power they have over you. They have the power to make you feel happy or sad, which is why when things don’t go as planned there is this fear in you.
21. They Are Boring
Professionals know that if you don’t have anything interesting going on, it doesn’t really matter how hot you are or who you work for; you’re not going to be of much interest to a potential partner.
22. Your Partner Is No Longer Who They Were When You First Met
In a perfect world, when we fall in love with somebody, that person would stay the same forever. But as hard as we may try to resist it, people change.
Sometimes they become better versions of themselves, more loving, caring, and supportive. Sometimes they turn into reckless hedonists or selfish narcissists.
Sometimes they grow apart from us and move on. And it’s not always possible to love them the way you did before anything changed.
Over time it is inevitable that each of us will change and grow as individuals. The things that you once loved about your partner may be the same things that annoy you now. Perhaps they’ve gained weight or lost weight or they have become toxics, possessed some bad traits you can’t deal with anymore.
25. You Have Different Visions For The Future
You once had a vision for the future that included your partner in every scenario: raising kids together, buying a house together, growing old together, but now that vision is shifting because your goals don’t align as much as they used to.
Maybe your priorities have changed over the years, or maybe it was just a fantasy that has faded away as reality set in. Whatever the reason, it’s not abnormal if one or both of you are not feeling same way.
If you aren’t feeling the gushy passion for your partner that you used to, it can be disconcerting. But rather than dropping everything and running for the hills, first ask yourself: Is this a normal part of a long-term relationship?
Not feeling as in love with your partner as you once were is totally normal. It doesn’t mean that you no longer care about your partner or that you want to be with somebody else. It just means that you are evolving as a couple and there are new things to discover about one another.
26. You Don’t Feel Like Spending Time With Your Partner
There is one thing that love can do for you – it can make you want to spend every spare moment in the company of your beloved.
Love is full of energy, and that energy can make you feel like dancing in the rain, walking barefoot on the beach, or simply watching TV together.
When you first met, you couldn’t stand to be apart. You were obsessed with each other and always looking for excuses to find time together. You loved being a twosome, and were excited to share everything you were experiencing (no matter how mundane) with your partner.
But now, you’re not feeling the same way. Now, instead of wanting them around you all of the time, you’re actually starting to feel like you need some space from them and their opinions.
Is this normal? Is it always like this? Do we become less obsessed with our partners as time goes on? And what does this mean for our relationships?
If you don’t feel like being with your partner, it is a sure sign that there is no love involved.
What to do: You can try to talk to each other and find out if there are any problems that disturb your relationship.
If talking doesn’t help, perhaps you should start looking for a new partner who will be able to sweep you off your feet.
27. You’re Too Similar To Each Other
It can seem like a great idea at first – ‘We love doing all the same things!’ However, after a while it can become difficult finding new ways in which to relax and enjoy.
28. You Don’t Feel Appreciated
Appreciation is one of the best thing that can happen to partners in a relationship. Not being appreciated in any way in your relationship with your partner may be one of the reasons you are not in love with your partner anymore.
If You don’t feel much gratitude towards your partner then it could lead to lost of interest.
29. Loneliness
You are lonely in the relationship, even when your partner is right there with you.